


Becoming The Wolf

by TheFightingBull



Series: The Wolf [2]
Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Affectionate Insults, Completed, F/M, Fix-It of Sorts, I Will Note It When It Comes, M/M, Negan Being Negan (Walking Dead), Negan's potty mouth, Nice Negan (Walking Dead), One Chapter Is From The Past, Pansexual Negan (Walking Dead), Protective Negan (Walking Dead), Sort Of, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:40:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25659874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFightingBull/pseuds/TheFightingBull
Summary: Various perspectives of Negan and his acquisition of Alexandria and the Survivor's Group. A continuation of Wolf In Sheep's Clothing. You will want to read that one or this one won't make sense.https://archiveofourown.org/works/25352851/chapters/61473259
Relationships: Laura/Original Male Character, Maggie Greene/Glenn Rhee, Rick Grimes/Negan
Series: The Wolf [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1860526
Comments: 7
Kudos: 37





	1. Laura

**_Laura_ **

Laura’s loyalty to Negan was unwavering. Period.

She’d been in a bad way when she first met the man who seemed larger than life. She was a sophomore who had shown up to her first PE class with a swollen black eye. The guy she so naively believed herself to be in love with didn’t like her “sass”. After watching the way her dad and uncles behaved toward her mom and aunts, she put up with it, assumed it was just how things were between some couples.

But Coach Negan, by reputation, was just as loud, vulgar, and  _ mean _ as her dad, so she was surprised by his reaction when meeting for the first time.

“Jeezus! Look at that fucking shiner! You been fighting in school, kid?” Negan eyed her in her inappropriate gym attire skeptically. Her shorts were too short, and she wore a revealing tank-top. “You sure as shit don’t look like you’re out there throwing down with bad-bitches like Arat Avery over there.”

A quick glance to the dark-skinned girl with bleach blonde hair told Laura just what he’d meant. He was basically saying she was more likely to sleep around than go toe-to-toe with anyone. Arat Avery had been a bully since they’d attended elementary school together, but rumor had it that was because she was bullied at home, too. 

“Laura’s a slut!” Cory Ashford called out, causing a lot of laughter.

She remembered her eyes burning at the accusation, but then that big, heavy hand settled gently on her left shoulder. Her coach brought his face close to hers and whispered. “If there is someone you love or someone who is  _ supposed  _ to love you putting violent hands on you, tell me. I’ll breaking every fucking bone in their hands.”

How could she have possibly known he was dead serious?

She’d been out back smoking when she was supposed to be in English about two weeks into the second semester. Her boyfriend, Joel Mitchem, was cussing her out and talking about what a slut she was. By then, she’d learned to just let him talk. If she interrupted, even to defend herself, he’d start hitting her. Hell, he might have even broken up with her.

At that moment, being alone felt far worse than the bruises.

“Answer me, you stupid whore!” Joel shouted.

“I will when you ask me a damned question!” She’d snapped out, her frustration having boiled over before she could stop and think.

Laura hit the ground hard and she immediately curled up into a fetal position, protecting her stomach, face, and chest as he started kicking her. She knew better than to cry or scream because when her mother or aunts did, it only incited their men to even more aggression.

And then, as quickly as the blows had started, they stopped. Instead she heard a scuffle and at least two hard impacts of flesh on flesh. She looked up to see Coach Negan stomping on her boyfriend’s hand, again and again as Joel screamed.

“You think it’s okay to hit women?” Negan snarled with a rage she’d heard before, but never in her defense. “Huh? Answer me you fucking shit-stain!”

“Please!” Joel cried.

“Hitting a fucking child!” Negan had continued, his hazel eyes black with fury as he moved onto Joel’s left hand. “You’ll never use these fucking hands again you worthless, waste of flesh!”

Joel never went to the cops. At least, not to press charges on her coach. He was too old for her. He was twenty-five and he had no business seeing a sixteen-year-old, let alone hitting and fucking her. She never did find out what he’d said to the hospital when he went in. All that was known was that Coach Negan continued to work for the school, and even more comforting was the fact that he kept inviting students to his and wife’s place to play ping-pong in their garage.

Laura became a constant guest and more than once Coach Negan and his wife Lucille had allowed her to spend the night to avoid her dad. They both offered their home quite often to those who they felt needed it, and Laura was spared a lot of sleepless nights thanks to their kindness.

That story alone would have guaranteed her loyalty for all eternity to Negan and Lucille, but she’d run into him during the apocalypse too.

He rescued her and two other students, Arat Avery and Denny Patrick, from being eaten by about twenty of the undead when they were cornered in a pharmacy. The relief she felt the day he crippled Joel was nothing to the moment they saw Negan bludgeoning zombie after zombie as he worked his way toward them.

“Let’s get the fuck outta here before these fucks fucking fuck us.” Negan snapped off and not one of them hesitated to follow their high-school coach’s orders.

Laura stood by Negan faithfully, just like Denny and Arat. At least… Until Denny died. No matter where Negan went, no matter what he did, or who else tagged along, she would never leave his side. He was her hero. The big brother she wanted or maybe even the father she knew she’d always deserved.

Becoming a Savior had felt right. It had felt necessary to both survive and help others to survive. They were going to save the fucking world and she was only proud to fight at his side. Proud to help him go from being the kindest, most protective gym teacher the world knew to the most intimidating and in charge asshole of the apocalypse.

Going to Alexandria was a dream come true though. She didn’t give herself away, but she wanted to touch her stomach. To comfort the small being within her and tell it that everything would be okay. She’d get to raise it within the safe walls of an actual community. One that Negan had promised was as gorgeous and white picket fenced as possible.

Denny would have been so relieved for their baby.


	2. Arat

**_Arat_ **

Arat stood beside her leader, but her eyes were focused on Simon. The man with the thick brown mustache was pissed off and while she understood why, she also wasn’t going to allow Simon to touch Negan. He’d be a pile of bones within his skin-suit before he had the opportunity to even spit at the leader of the Saviors. Arat didn’t care for Simon as it was, but ever since Oceanside…

She shuddered just thinking about the awful things she’d done that day. All those men and boys killed by Savior guns. She’d always tried to play it tough. Play it cool. Hadn’t she learned it from the best, though? Laugh when you want to cry. Make a joke out of anything that disturbs or disgusts.  _ Never _ let them see you tremble.

“This is… This is bad, Negan,” Simon insisted as he paced in front of them out by the bikes.

“You know better,” Arat warned, not fearing the hateful gaze Simon threw at her. “You do this in the war room or not at all.”

Negan laughed and for a moment both she and Simon expected him to let it slide. She could tell by the smug grin Simon gave, only for it to falter when Negan tilted his head. “You heard the woman, Simon. You really wanna do this out here or is that fucking tongue gonna stop wagging until we get to the war room?”

She was pleased when Simon stepped the fuck off and headed inside to continue their chat.

With a small step to Negan’s side she said in a soft, quiet voice, “He’s been getting worse, Negan.”

“I wouldn’t have to deal with him at all if you’d take his fucking place,” Negan grumbled back.

Arat couldn’t help but wince. Negan offered to give her Simon’s spot anytime she was ready to kill him. Especially after she’d told him about Oceanside and how he’d disobeyed Negan’s orders. But she had a pact to fulfill, and while it was about Negan, it wasn’t within his rights to change the nature of it.

From the beginning Denny, Arat and Laura had pledged themselves to protecting the man who not only cared for them as students but had ensured their survival as young adults. All of them vowed to fulfill their roles to Negan until the day they died. Denny and Arat were his bodyguards and Laura was basically his spy.

So it didn’t matter how often Negan offered her a promotion, she’d never take it. She was at his side to keep him safe. To keep men like Simon from trying to usurp his hard-won power. To keep people like the Survivors of Alexandria from seeing him as weak and taking a shot.

“Come on, Kid,” he smiled as he threw an arm around her shoulder. “Let’s get a fucking bite to eat.”

She raised a brow. “Weren’t you supposed to be heading to the war room?”

Negan snorted. “So I can listen to him bitch and moan about Alexandria and Rick’s crew? Fuck that shit. He can eat a dick while I have a sandwich.”

She moved with him toward the “break room” the higher-ranking Saviors used. She wanted to ask, but she didn’t want to be as disrespectful as she’d just accused Simon of being moments before. Still, she’d never seen him so lenient with a group and to be honest, she’d warned him after their outpost was taken out not to try and infiltrate Alexandria for that reason.

If she’d had her way, they would have offed Paul ‘Jesus’ Rovia for putting Rick’s crew up to their devastating mission against the Saviors. It was unacceptable of Hilltop to be pulling that shit and it needed to be taken care of before something worse happened.

“I’m thinking about sending Saviors to all the communities we run,” Negan said as they stood in line to grab some ready-made sandwiches. “Get them involved so that we’re less likely to see a rebellion.”

“Not a bad idea,” Arat shrugged, because it really wasn’t.

“Ask, Arat,” Negan said as he grabbed them each a sandwich and some cut up carrots.

“Not here, Sir,” she shook her head.

He stopped and waited until she looked at him before he grinned. “Ask, Arat. I won’t tell you a second time.”

She swallowed, “Why  _ did _ you bring back those three Survivors? And why did you only kill one?”

“First off, we only kill one fuck. That’s all we’ve  _ ever _ fucking killed,” Negan glowered somewhat loudly for anyone listening in as they took a seat at an empty table. “At least under  _ my _ orders, that’s all we’ve killed. You brutalize more and we get fucking Oceanside all over again. We get a bunch of fucking women and their daughters hiding fuck knows where!

“We showed too much fucking force and what the fuck happened? Simon lost us the entire damned community,” Negan snapped, eying one or two men that Arat knew had been with her and Simon during that “demonstration.”

“Let’s see, you had another question… The one banging the shit on death’s fucking door is pregnant with her dead husband’s kid,” Negan said with a shrug. “Took the other two dipshits so that I don’t have to waste any more fucking resources getting her back home if she doesn’t bite the big one.”

Arat sucked in a breath before starting to eat. She’d been with Negan from the beginning. She knew what children meant to the man. What they’d meant to Lucille. Why he’d be merciful to anyone trying to help a kid survive the nightmare that had become life. That shit had always mattered to Negan and it was clear that it always would.

She never doubted her leader, but she had been curious if only for the change in his view of Alexandria and the Survivors. Negan had been  _ livid _ when they learned about the outpost falling. It wasn’t easy at first to determine who’d done it. But eventually they’d started hearing rumors from Hilltop that there was a community full of children and people incapable of striking such a blow to his people. But, they were the closest to the outpost that had been slaughtered.

So, Negan had gone to find out what exactly they were dealing with.

Once a week Negan came back with more intelligence, claiming to the Alexandrians that he was on a supply run. He’d always go back with a small portion of Sanctuary’s own supplies to make it look legit. His fury softened with every new report. She knew it was coming. Hell, his lieutenants knew it, too. Negan hated killing women, but he’d do it if necessary. He did  _ not _ kill anyone under the age of sixteen unless they committed an act foul enough for him to lose complete control of his temper or to defend himself or his people.

So, when Negan reported back that there were in fact children and young teens in Alexandria; that there were men and women who had survived so long without even seeing a walker? Well, Arat had figured he’d be taking in the community as he had Hilltop and The Kingdom.

“I see what the fuck you are thinking,” Negan spat. “And you’re wrong.”

“No, Sir, you don’t,” she denied. “I respect you. Possibly more so now that I see you’re essentially the same man you were when you rescued me, Laura and Denny.”

“Just keep that shit to yourself, Arat.”

“Gonna be hard to do when those three Alexandrians head home,” she grinned. “You know everyone will think you’re fucking someone in your new community.”

“I am,” Negan shrugged. “So, let ‘em.”

“One more question, boss?” Arat asked because it was the one she’d always wanted an answer to but had been too terrified to ask.

“Shoot,” Negan ordered before taking a large bite of his sandwich.

“Why didn’t you punish us for Oceanside?” she whispered and tried to ignore the itching in her eyes.

He was silent for a long time, just watching her. He looked angry all over again. No, not just angry. Disappointed. He stared at her the same way he had when he found her back in sophomore year beating up some stupid white girl who couldn’t defend herself if she’d wanted to.

“That pit in your stomach. That hole that eats away at you everytime you look in the damned mirror, Arat?” Negan said in a soft, hateful tone. “ _ That’s _ your punishment. Living with yourself after allowing Simon to give that order. Dealing with your guilt every fucking day, knowing that all you had to do that night was put a motherfuckin’ bullet in his brain pain and  _ leave _ .”

She nodded and felt too ill to enjoy her sandwich, but she ate it. Saviors didn’t waste food.

After several long minutes, Negan spoke up again but, in a tone low enough for only her ears. “Don’t doubt for one fucking minute that he’s only alive to serve as the same punishment for me,” he said softly. “To remind me that I shouldn’t have and still  _ can’t _ fucking trust him with our people. Seeing his face reminds me of everything  _ we _ lost because of one fucking mistake.”


	3. Sasha

**_Sasha_ **

****

Sasha walked along with Abraham, Negan and his bodyguard Arat. She wasn’t surprised a man like Negan would require some kind of protection, but he didn’t strike her as the type that would want it. He was a cocky, arrogant piece of shit as far as she could tell. He was also a master manipulator. That much was obvious.

She eyed the young woman and didn’t detect any type of intimacy between them. Not a romantic one anyhow. The more she watched them, the more Arat and Negan reminded Sasha of Daryl and Rick. Daryl wasn’t ever going to be Rick’s right hand man, but he was always going to be at Rick’s side to protect and back Rick up.

“Just wanted to thank you again for Maggie,” Abraham said as they started to walk through the workers on the ground floor.

Sasha didn’t hear Negan’s response. She was too busy holding in her disgust as the people around them started to kneel. It was yet another sign that Negan was some kind of monster. Who the Hell demanded that people kneel when he was around.

She caught Arat’s stink-eye.

“Why do they do this?” she asked, not caring if she interrupted the conversation between her man and Negan.

Negan grinned back at her as they headed for Doctor Carson and Maggie to check up on her. “You’ll have to ask Arat all about that shit. It’s a helluva fucking story.”

Sasha didn’t mind when Arat moved closer to her and began to speak in a low tone. It was obvious to Sasha that both Negan and Abraham were listening closely too, because their conversation didn’t resume as Arat began to speak.

“Around the beginning, when we were trying to organize a few groups that wanted to fight over Sanctuary, I couldn’t be sure what people were doing or thinking. Negan kept saying he wasn’t worried about it, but Denny and I disagreed.

“It was  _ our _ leader putting himself at risk with these dumbasses. It was Negan going to the new groups and making the arrangements for their own protection, but people are fucking stupid.”

It wasn’t something she thought she’d agree with, but considering the groups the Survivors had faced? She could imagine too well what Arat was worried about. It was the same things she’d always been worried about with Abraham and Rick every time new people came around. Anytime they tried to join up with a new group or welcome stragglers into their own.

Hell, look at what had happened with Negan!

“Three different groups of about six to ten people each wanted Negan to share everything we had gathered and fortified. They wanted to be trusted with weapons and they wanted an equal say in how things were run, but Negan was smarter than that. Knew if he gave an inch, they’d run him over for a mile,” Arat continued. “So people started getting antsy around us and especially Negan anytime he came down to talk to the leaders of these little factions. They’d palm their weapons or fiddle with things that could be used to hurt.

“When someone tried to tackle Negan with a knife, Denny took the bitch down, but it was too close a call.” Sasha noted a genuine amount of fear and concern in the woman’s voice. “So, Negan bashed in the stupid bitch’s skull. Everyone knew Negan hated killing women, he’d said so a lot, so they assumed that if a female failed to kill him, she’d be less severely punished.”

“Fucking wrong,” Negan snorted as they all four assembled into the empty doctor’s office.

Arat snickered as she shook her head. “Denny had shouted for everyone to get on their fucking knees. I told them to stay there and from that moment forward, we made sure the act spread like wildfire. Anyone who didn’t kneel, Savior or worker alike, were punished until finally they all got with the program.”

What had at first sounded creepy and egotistical suddenly made sense. Sasha had never been dumb. She knew how power plays worked and she understood how men like Negan came into power. As horrible as the idea was to kneel before anyone, she saw the strategy behind it and she found herself appreciating the farce.

New people like herself would walk into Sanctuary and see blind sheep. Arat and Negan and whoever the real Denny was, they saw safety! They saw a way to determine when they needed to be worried and when they needed to prepare for a fight. It wasn’t a bad strategy especially when Sasha recalled that in the Sanctuary alone there had to be at least two hundred people!

“Go ahead, Sasha,” Negan grinned at her. “Be impressed. I know I’d fuckin’ be!”

Abraham laughed, catching Sasha off guard. “Sash here is more likely to kiss her own ass than cop to it.”

Negan joined in the laughter and Sasha just wanted to punch them both. If she thought she could get away with it, she would have. As it was, she didn’t feel like tempting Arat into any kind of fight, let alone a gun fight where Sasha was unarmed.

“Funny,” she settled for a scowl in her boyfriend’s direction.

She fell silent when Dr. Carson came in with Maggie in a wheelchair. “She needs a lot of rest, Negan. No physical exertions. It’s going to be a hard and dangerous pregnancy.”

“We got prenatals available?” Arat asked.

“Those cost a lot of points,” Dr. Carson frowned. “I doubt she’s been set up on anything like that yet, so I didn’t grab her any.”

“You’re fucking shitting me,” Negan sneered.

“We can trade,” Sasha offered immediately. “I don’t doubt we have something that can be brought in place of the vitamins.”

“Awful kind of you to offer me my own shit in place of my own shit, but I got it covered,” Negan said as he turned his eyes on the doctor.

Abraham must have caught the irritation in her expression because he was immediately at her side and gripping her hand tightly. She took a deep breath and shook her head. It wasn’t right. It wasn’t right that they had to give Negan everything and anything he wanted. How dare they call themselves Saviors?

“Might as well send all that we have to Alexandria,” Arat added. “I’m sure Laura and Maggie can share what we have between them.”

“Relax, baby,” Abraham whispered. “Just relax.”

“Make sure it gets split evenly,” Negan nodded. “Got that doc?’

“Yes, Sir,” Dr. Carson swallowed. “Split evenly.  _ All _ of them.”

Sasha frowned as she looked at Negan skeptically. “I don’t understand you. Why are you doing this? Why are you taking care of Maggie? After what you did to Spencer…” She bit her tongue when she saw the doctor pale and Arat glare.

Negan however rolled his eyes. “Fuck you, Sasha. I’m not the bad guy here. Have you fucks not learned that yet? I didn’t kill fifty-five of yours to make up for  _ my _ lost friends and people. I didn’t allow  _ my _ Saviors to invade and raid all of Alexandria despite the constant bitching and crying about it.

“Believe me, Sasha, had I done what Rick and your little crew do on the regular, not a fucking one of you would be alive to piss and moan about poor little Spencer Monroe.” Negan’s voice and volume grew with each word as he moved closer to her and Abraham. She held her ground, but kept her eyes down, no wanting him to believe she was challenging him. “So I think instead of copping a fucking attitude a mile wide, you should show me a bit more motherfucking gratitude!”

“Say it,” she heard Arat hiss to the side of her.

“Excuse me?” she asked, confused, but with too much attitude. Even she could hear it.

“Say thank you,” Arat said, her dark eyes flashing furiously.

Abraham tightened his grip on her hand as he quickly spoke up. “Thank you, Negan, really. Thank you.”

“Well gee whiz, Abe, you sure are fuckin’ welcome, but I’m gonna need to hear it from Sasha, because I just don’t think she gets what the Hell I’ve just done!” Negan smiled. “Arat, explain it to her. Who are you, Darling?”

Before Sasha could defend herself, Arat spoke up. “I’m Negan.”

Negan looked to Sasha and put a finger to his lips with obvious warning to shut her mouth. “Arat, what does Negan do?”

“Negan saves lives. Negan protects people. Negan ends the dead who threaten all that belong to Negan,” Arat stated with absolute conviction.

It made Sasha want to throw up. It was indoctrination is what it was. “Atta girl,” Negan grinned as he stepped up to Sasha. “Now, Sasha, do you understand what I’ve done for you by making all that you and your group are, mine?”

Not wanting to give in, she took a deep breath and through gritted teeth said, “Yes, Negan.”

“And?” He smiled, his eyes daring her to misinterpret his question.

She licked her bottom lip and then looked down at the floor as she whispered. “Thank you, Negan, for all you’re doing for us.”

He laughed happily and pulled her and Abe in for an awkward and unexpected hug. “Shit, it’s no sweat off my balls, Sasha. Happy to help!”


	4. Rick

**_Rick_ **

Rick waited impatiently for Negan and his crew to arrive for their first pick up. He paced back and forth beside the leader of the Saviors staying with them. She was calm and cool, as she had been since she and the others helped them get back home. The Alexandrians, the ones who didn’t know or see what the Saviors were capable of, they had welcomed her and the six members of her team somewhat warmly.

“Is he gonna kill someone today?” Rick asked, because he needed to know. He needed to be prepared for war if that was the case.

“Are you going to give him a reason to?” Laura countered with a glare.

He shook his head, but he didn’t know what he was about to face. Was he going to get the Negan that pretended to be a good man and a decent person? Or was Rick going to see the monster that beat Spencer to death with a bat and took perverse pleasure in terrifying Rick and his people. 

“Look, I prepared your people the best I could by getting the shit he’d want ready. He’s not going to let you keep all your guns, Rick and he’s going to go through everyone’s house to make sure none are being hidden from him.”

Rick nodded, but anger seethed in his belly. “So is this how he does things, then? He just goes undercover, comes up with some stupid name and then turns on everyone?”

He looked up just in time to see Laura shake her head. “No, that’s usually my job. I go in, meet a community, find out what they are like and who they are. What kind of value do they have… How costly would an uprising be and if they are capable of it.”

Rick frowned. “Then why didn’t  _ you  _ come? Why did Negan do it?”

She smiled softly. “He said I was on bereavement.”

Watching her touch her stomach, Rick frowned. So that’s how it was. They’d figured out she was pregnant the first night back. Mostly because she went looking for prenatal vitamins and a couple of her people went house to house looking for a crib or bassinet. Laura didn’t bother hiding her condition, but Rick had seen her trying to hide how sad or excited she was.

When Rick explained that Maggie wouldn’t be back to his own group and everyone panicked and demanded they go back for her, it was Laura who stepped forward and warned them off the plan. She assured the entire group that Maggie was safe, that Negan wasn’t going to kill a pregnant woman unless she tried to kill him or one of his own and that she was probably in better, safer hands being near Negan than she’d face without him.

“Little pig, little pig,” Negan’s voice called beyond the screened gate. “Let. Me. In.”

The gates were opened quickly and Rick felt a little silly for having gotten so deep in his own thoughts. It didn’t take long for the Saviors to filter in, especially as Negan took the lead. He sauntered over, looking like the exact same man Rick had seen for a few months, but feeling like a complete stranger.

A dark skinned girl with half dark brown hair and half bleached hair went immediately to Laura. They started talking quietly, but quickly. The darker girl’s eyes never once left Negan though. Rick was pretty sure the girl was Arat, Negan’s bodyguard.

“So, Laura tells me you have the need for protection,” Rick started as the man stepped closer to him, swinging Lucille around. “Ever wonder  _ why _ that might be?”

Instead of getting pissed off, Negan laughed. “Yeah, the remainder of the three amigos,” he said in a tone that almost sounded sad. “Those girls won’t let anything happen to me, whether I want it that way or not.”

“Why?” Rick frowned.

“Fucking gratitude, asshole,” Negan snapped, his mood fluctuating faster than the weather.

“We should talk,” Rick announced, hoping he didn’t sound as nervous as he felt. Hell, he hoped he didn’t sound as desperate as he was. He just wanted to understand what happened. How this all came to be.

“You ordering me or asking me?” Negan growled, again stepping into Rick’s personal space and seeking eye contact.

Rick faltered, but then closed his eyes. He had to make it work for all of them or people were going to die. That was the whole point of Negan’s display with Spencer. “Asking. Please?”

When Negan nodded, Rick felt a small amount of relief, but then suddenly, “Lucille” was pressed into his hand. “Hold on to her for me. Treat her right, though. She hits the fucking ground, I’ll introduce her to someone else in this fine ass community.”

Swallowing, Rick accepted the bat and started walking toward the house Denny had lived in. On such a crisp, beautiful day, it was hard to believe that so much darkness was at Rick’s side. That so much darkness had once resided in the bright, welcoming home of Negan’s version of Denny Patrick. After the reveal that horrid night in the forest, the house had been left alone. No one knew if Negan would keep it for his or what, but Laura had agreed with the Alexandrian’s plans and forbid her own people from entering or touching it.

Speaking of Laura, as they walked Rick couldn’t help but notice she and Arat were following at a respectful distance. It irked him, but Rick supposed he would have been the same and he knew instantly who would have his back. Daryl, Michonne, Abraham and Carl. That’s just how it was. Carol would have too if she hadn’t left shortly after the outpost… And Glenn…

“What the fuck do you want Rick? I ain’t got all damned day!” Negan said loudly, once more stirring him from his thoughts..

“Thank you,” Rick decided to start with, because after talking to Laura, he knew it was necessary. “Thank you for what you did for my people. For my family.”

It was obvious by Negan’s startled expression that thanking him wasn’t expected. But it was welcome. Rick could tell by the genuine smile that had crossed the older, taller man’s face. Not wanting to lose momentum, Rick continued on in a hurry.

“Sasha and Abraham, when they got back with Maggie, they told me everything and I,” Rick swallowed hard, it was a new and difficult position he was in. Thanking a man for doing the right thing. Thanking a man for  _ not _ killing or torturing his people. “I recognize now that we were wrong, for what we did to your outpost.”

“Damn straight,” Negan snorted.

“Look, I, I think you initially planned to kill Abraham or myself. I spoke to, to someone who has experience with your people and—”

“I’m gonna cut you short right there, Rick,” Negan sighed. “I know who your fucking contact was. I know all about ‘Jesus’ and while this might piss you the fuck off, you’re gonna need to come to grips with reality. Jesus and Gregory are the ones who will pay for the bulk of your crew’s crimes against me and mine.”

“But—”

Negan raised a hand, and once again Rick was compelled to stop talking. “Rick, you were a cop, right?” He nodded. “Then you know, if  _ you _ hire or coerce someone into killing another,  _ you’re _ more likely to get the death penalty than the actual killer. ‘Specially if the hit was a fucking success.”

Rick wanted to argue and fight for the Hilltop runner. He still felt Negan could be reasoned with, but he couldn’t fault the Savior’s logic. But was that all it was, or was there something else at play? Maybe it had been that kiss, that secret kiss that no one knew about. The one they’d shared when Carl had finally let up and gone back upstairs…

_ “Don’t be an asshole to my dad, he was just trying to do the right thing.” Carl snapped as he’d started to head upstairs.  _

_ Rick was sure that was where the conversation would end, but Denny chuckled and called out; “Someday Carl, you’re going to learn that not everyone agrees on what’s right and what’s wrong.”  _

_ He’d seen the pain, the anger in Denny’s eyes. Knew how close the man in the leather jacket was to physically ripping Spencer to pieces and that night was the first night that Rick thought Denny capable of it.  _

_ When they’d first met, when Denny answered his questions, he’d wondered if the strange, vulgar survivor could really kill. It felt like bravado. Abraham and Rick had discussed it extensively when he first came to Alexandria and both agreed Denny was just too loud and obnoxious to be sincere when he mouthed off threats.  _

_ “You agree with your boy, Rick? You think I was being an asshole to you?” Denny asked.  _

_ He shook his head. “I trust your temper, Denny. You ain’t gonna attack me because I won’t let you or Maggie go after Spencer.” _

_ He watched as Denny looked up to the ceiling, as if he was staring right through it at Michonne and Maggie. The poor woman had been inconsolable and Rick felt it was best that he stay away from her until she was calm enough to understand. _

_ “She’ll get through it, Denny. Maggie’s one of the strongest people I’ve met.”  _

_ Rick didn’t know what he was expecting but it wasn’t Denny moving so quickly. Nor was it the sudden, immovable surface at his back or the soft and yet demanding lips of Denny on his own. Unexpected as the kiss was, Rick melted into it and returned with his own fiery passion as if to thank Denny for his anger on behalf of Maggie, on behalf of himself.  _

_ Rick wanted to punish Spencer, to hurt him. But Rick could not and would not become the monster he’d been. He could not execute without proof. So it felt good to know that someone out there saw and felt what he did, wanted the blood as badly as Rick.  _

_ “Don’t think this changes anything, Rick,” Denny had whispered. “I’ll still get my pound of flesh.”  _

The warmth of that moment, the passion he felt in Negan’s hold as he’d pressed his lips to Rick’s. Even before ‘Denny’ had spoken after the kiss, Rick had felt that darkness in the man. An iron will that would do whatever it took to get what he felt was necessary and at the time, it had been thrilling. Abraham and Daryl were good, capable men, but Negan was… He was something else. He had a passionate drive in him that Rick had never encountered before the end or most certainly since. 

“As for who I would have killed,” Negan said, calling Rick’s attention back to the present. “Had it all been  _ your _ crew’s own plans, yeah. It would have been you or Abraham. Fuck, it most likely would’ve been Abe though,” Negan shrugged as if they were discussing picking up groceries.

“Why?”

“You fucking brought Carl along, Rick. Even if I hadn’t known you, I wouldn’t have fucking killed a kid’s father right in fucking front of him.” Negan paused a moment before he changed subjects, before Rick could ask what they both knew he wanted to know most. “You shitbags taking care of my Laura and her team?”

Rick nodded though noted the possessive ‘ _ my’ _ and decided not to pursue his other train of thought. “Actually that was another thing I wanted to talk to you about. Right now she’s on her own. In her own house, I mean. She didn’t want her team with her. They have a house amongst themselves, but…”

“But fucking what?” Negan demanded impatiently.

“I was wondering if you’d help me talk her into staying with Maggie,” Rick asked. “We don’t know much about her, but one of the Saviors hinted her man died somewhat recently and maybe they could keep an eye on each other.”

“Fucking warped ass support group if you ask me,” Negan snorted, but Rick was sure the leader hadn’t immediately rejected the idea.

A startling thought struck Rick and he took a deep breath before he asked. “He wasn’t, I mean. Her man isn’t dead because of us? It wasn’t us, right?”

Negan’s eyes widened as his smile became sharp and cruel. “Oh Rick… If it had been your people, if Denny’s death had been caused by your people, Laura wouldn’t be moving in and not a damned one of you would still be amongst the living.” The man stepped up onto his porch and took a seat in the rocker he’d always liked. “Take a seat, Rick, we’ll talk.”

Looking back at Arat and Laura, Rick could tell they weren’t the least bit concerned. He gently set the bat down between Negan’s chair and the other rocker before taking a seat. He could see the apprehension in a few of the Alexandrian’s faces, but Laura had already warned them to keep their distance. To make sure they didn’t get caught listening in or Negan would cut their ears off or burn the sides of their faces with an iron.

When he was settled, Rick faced the man, wishing he could see Denny again. Not Negan. Whoever this guy was, he was Denny on crack. Unpredictable if only because he was in charge and could get away with it.

Wait, had he just said Denny’s death? Rick frowned as he debated on digging deeper for the story there, but honestly, Rick would rather take his chances with Laura. 

“If anything happens to Laura, anything at all, Rick, I’ll fucking burn Alexandria to the damned ground while you watch. I’ll brutally murder at least one person in every motherfucking family, just to make you  _ all  _ fucking suffer,” Negan said calmly, quietly. Just like Carl had been so frightened of when Glenn died. “The three amigos, they’re practically my…”

Rick didn’t need Negan to finish his thought. Both of them probably knew it, too. At once, Rick recognized that love of a parent. He might not say it out loud, but Rick could guess.

“Denny Patrick, one of the three amigos…” Negan started softly, still in that quiet, dangerous tone that warned it would be a mistake to interrupt. “We were all out on a fucking run in a more dangerous territory, but we damned well knew the fuckin’ pay out would be worth every drop of fucking blood spilled. It was a FEMA and National Guard base.

“I fucking went because I don’t like sending people to do shit jobs that I’m not willing to do myself and because I sure as fuck wasn’t going to let  _ them  _ go without me there to protect them,” Negan shrugged, but there was tightness to his shoulders that Rick recognized as a forced, phony movement. “Denny, Arat and I, we got cut off from Laura and the others. We fucking fought, got out, you know? No big fucking deal.”

Rick nodded along to the story, but it was obvious where the tale was headed. Rick couldn’t help but glance around them to be sure no one else was listening in. Negan didn’t seem concerned one bit. 

“Then as we’re headed the fuck home, the four of us in my car, casual as a fucking conversation about the damned weather, Denny pops off with ‘just so you know I got scratched back there and I’m feeling a fever coming on’,” Negan shook his head miserably and then looked up at the bright blue sky. “Fucking Laura… I pulled over because I figured she’d be the one to start bawling and losing her shit, but it was Arat that did. Laura just calmly pulled Denny into her arms and played with his hair in that backseat like it was any other shit-ass night.

“She sang him a pretty little song and the moment Denny fell asleep; Laura shoved her ice pick through his skull as Arat cried on my shoulder.”

At first, Rick was stunned by the story, but then, he was stunned by the fact Negan told it. He didn’t understand why Negan would tell him any of that? It didn’t make sense… and yet, maybe it did.

After “career day” Laura had been telling them all that if they got with the program and did as they were told, they’d see. They’d see that the Saviors weren’t bad guys. Unfortunately, Rick was startled to see she wasn’t lying. Yeah, Negan and his people were willing to do what needed to be done. They would scare people and brutalize them if need be, but they were all on the same page.

It suddenly became clear that Negan and his Saviors genuinely believed they were helping everyone survive. That they were saving people!

If Rick didn’t buy in? If he thought Negan and his people were monsters? There _ would _ be a war. A war that Rick honestly believed would end in the destruction of Alexandria and the slaughter of the people within her walls. 

“I knew them before,” Negan said, interrupting his thoughts and Rick picked up on another change in the man’s voice.

It was as if Rick were talking to Denny again, or well, Negan’s version. Point was, it was just like before. Back when Rick would share stories of what his group had gone through. Back when they were both friends and Rick was the leader. They were talking on friendly terms.

“Before the end of the world?” Rick asked, if only to encourage Negan to finish his thought.

“They were my fucking students. Not a damned one of them eighteen when this fucked up shit started,” Negan smiled. “Arat was a bitch of a bully. Real piece of shit, but I believed in her. We pushed her to be a better fucking person and she rose to the challenge. Laura… Well, she had that low self-esteem shit before all this. I crippled her fuckwit ex when I found out he was beating her and we gave her a place to crash when she needed it. And Denny? I coached that boy right into a full-fucking-ride baseball scholarship. Had him over constantly.

“The fuckin’ point in telling you all this, Rick,” Negan looked him directly in the eyes as he allowed that shark-like smile to spread across his face. “I can be your best fucking friend, or your worst fucking enemy. Either way, it’s  _ your  _ call.”

Rick watched as Negan got off the rocker and sauntered away from the house, calling for Laura in his loud booming voice. He knew he should join them, still if he could get Maggie and Laura to at least consider living in the same place, but he was stunned. 

There was so much he’d just learned of the man that  _ owned _ them. The man that terrorized and frightened the Alexandrians. And yet, Rick couldn’t deny that they’d started it all. They were responsible for any bad blood. Had they been attacked by Negan and his saviors, that would have been one thing, but that’s not what happened. 

They attacked. They acted like so many groups Rick had come across before because he’d been arrogant. Because he’d wanted to get rid of threat before having to deal with it and instead, because of his poor planning, now they were under the thumb of that threat more thoroughly than they had been under anyone else’s. 

The Saviors were different.  _ Negan _ was different. The man with the bat was smarter, more vicious, and certainly better prepared than any other threat that Rick and his Survivors had faced before. There wouldn’t be a slip of sanity where Negan gunned down and killed his own like the Governor. Negan wasn’t going to push them to the point of rage filled desperation to do what needed to be done like Joe and his Claimers. The leader of the Saviors wasn’t crazy enough to do something so terrible like eat people as those from Terminus had. They certainly weren’t as unorganized as the Wolves. 

Rick didn’t know what was going to happen in the future or how they’d get out from under Negan’s control. All he knew was that if he and the Survivors decided to try anything they were going to lose a lot of people and with Laura and her people there to basically spy on them, he somehow doubted they’d even get started before Negan brought in his a whole army of Saviors to stomp the Alexandrians out of existence. 

He sighed as he cooled the embers of his rebellion. For now at least, Negan was in charge of Alexandria.    


**Author's Note:**

> This story is completed and will be posted daily because I'm fucking impatient and can't sit on a story no matter how "good" it is for comments or kudos. So yeah, if you like it let me know. I have already started on a third part which will be told almost entirely from Negan's perspective.


End file.
